The driving forces in an obsession are power and/or control.
Referring to my last post, what was the real obsession in Saul’s case? Was it the fact that Saul believed in the traditions of Judaism, or was he obsessed with destroying anything that opposed his belief system? I venture to say that he was really obsessed with destroying the opposition. In this, we can see that the destructive nature of an obsession is the desire to control another’s actions, beliefs, or convictions.
Due to the saints devotion to the new Christian faith, Saul became obsessed with gaining power over them so that he might destroy what they believed. This power was given to him by the high priest in the letter he was carrying to Damascus. This letter was the symbol of power that fueled his violent and destructive nature.
Love is not selfish. However, an obsession is selfish. Love is not possessive. It does not imprison nor rob another of their right to decide their own destiny. On the other hand, an obsession seeks to and will determine the destiny of another. In the case of a relationship, many times one is in love with the idea of having or rather possessing another individual. Therefore, it is possible to be in love with the idea of love, rather than the individual.
Often in the church, young men and women fall in love with the idea of having someone who is interested in them. It is not always the individual they love, but rather the attention they receive or the idea that the individual wants them. This situation will open the door for lust. The individual that is obsessed, will do whatever is necessary to hold the attention of the pursuer. When this is discerned, many times they both fall prey to the deception of sin.
Take heed to your own thoughts. Keep them pure and holy. Remember. Love is always considerate of the emotions and desires of others. When this principle is missing in a relationship, there is an obsession of kind in the mix.
I love you